Do you play "ze rock n' roll"? So asked Cowboy Jack Clement of me some 15 years ago. I really didn't know how to answer the playful genius. I should have asked him what he thought about punk rock. I do know that watching his old pal Jerry Lee Lewis perform dead drunk in Sweden at a Country Music Festival was the most "punk" thing I'd ever seen but maybe it was simply "ze rock n' roll". What do these words mean anymore anyhow? As each generation plugs into the same three chord canon the spirit keeps getting stepped on to the point that it's all baby laxative now... sorry Killers. I don't mind the new old new stuff... Franz Ferdinand, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, all that goofy shit. None of it gets me off though. Neither do the ancients: Neil just did Harvest Part III and it sounds like sonic Ambient. People like Anthony DeCurtis that defend popular culture are a bit too touchy about their feedbag. Take it away and what can they write? At least Mikal Gilmore could one up Mailer but shit, he did have the inside track. Wonder what Tosches is up to? Thought of him the other day when I popped into a local beer and soda mart and the clerk had a cheek full of qat. Opium dens might have disappeared but it gladdened my heart to know that Yemen's favorite pastime has made it to the belly of the beast. I loved both Kung Fu Hustle and War Kai's 2046... great bookends. Throw in South Korea and Spain and film has never been more vibrant. McCartney's new pothead nursery rhymes are getting the big push, why did Chapman have to go and shoot the wrong Beatle? If it wasn't for pre-schoolers the fabulously over rated four would be forgotten by now. Speaking of Helter Skelter, why is Charlie still in jail? He never killed anyone. Sirhan Sirhan should also go free. Bobby Kennedy would be the first to say that his life ain't worth more than your average street thug. Which brings me to 50 Cent... watching him on Letterman the other night was the most painful thing I've witnessed since Dan Rather cried on Dave's shoulder. Unlike the late great Carson, Letterman has aged about as well as cheese whiz. His suggestion to "tell everybody how you've gone from a bad boy to a good boy" really showed his Indiana Klan roots. The same show had a guy running around on fire a la Spike Jonze. I guess no one bothered to watch the Jonze short on Fat Lip who has more to say about popular culture than a million Jacques Barzuns. The Frogs can really bring it, i.e. that Clotaire Rapaille dude who teaches corporate America how to sell dumb expensive shit like Hummers to people who hate France is a puppet master supreme... I can feel his sneer from my desk. How did we become a nation of business majors? Maybe the age of the individual is over... the Islamists and the pierced and tatted crowd have more in common than they think. Hasn't been a domestic spree killer in awhile, another sign we've lost our way. Are they all evangelicals now? I see the fashionistas have their cowboy books back on, at least the Chinese slippers are gone. What's with all the female beer bellies? They doing specific exercises to get that way? Can't believe how horny I've gotten in my mid forties. I'll be worried if I put together a rape kit and stash it in the trunk. The photographer William Eggleston said that he hates sports but could people watch in a bus station all day. Exactly. There is far too much attention being paid to silly shit. Guilty as charged. I bet Jesus had a big old dick and really knew how to use it. Wonder if he and Walt Whitman were wired the same. Couldn't get through the new Oscar Wilde biography but didn't really try. Picked up a free Koran the other day and was reading it on the toilet... is that allowed? Creative non-fiction is a vacuous term. God, I hope we don't have a bad winter. Can someone send me that new Bobby Bare record? I sure would appreciate it.